Overcoming Emotional Pains By Understanding Emotions

December 8, 2015
December 8, 2015 Kenneth

Understanding emotions is such a tricky but important topic, and we all have unwanted emotions that we don’t understand. You might wake up one day feeling down and just unhappy, and you don’t know what’s causing such an emotion. You may continue to react a certain way to life situations and you don’t know why!

Because Emotions are so powerful and negative ones cause a great deal of discomfort, we tend to ignore them, hope they go away and don’t like to deal with them.

For example, you could be experiencing emotional pain because you have issues in your social life, and you say to yourself that you’re bored and that you need a change. Then you make some changes in your life only to find yourself having those some bad emotions once again.

In this case, your solution provided only temporary relief because you didn’t know what the problem was in the first place.  But the pattern is repeated over and over again.

If you want to know the reasons behind your emotional pain, you’ve got to understand your own emotional needs first. You won’t be able to do any of these unless you first understand your emotion. In short, controlling emotions only comes after understanding emotions.

Understanding Your Emotions, Emotional Pain, and Emotional Needs

Before you can perfectly understand your own emotions, it’s important that you first acknowledge the fact that every person develops their own emotional needs starting way back in their childhood years. Because we all grow up in different environments, have different genetic dispositions and different life experiences, our needs are different from the emotional needs that other people develop. Thus, we all have our unique emotional needs.

This is what makes all so unique!

Quite often when we experience emotional pain in life, it is because of childhood emotional pain that we are still dealing with. You will feel it in your heart that something is wrong, but it will be very hard to understand what exactly is causing it.

The only way you will be able to understand your own emotions is to become aware of these emotions.  Awareness is the first step in healing. You may search online for the possible causes of your depression for example, and you’ll certainly find many of them. But how sure are you that these are the same reasons you are depressed? The answer to your question is within yourself. You have to look inside you to know what you feel is missing in your life, or what it is that can make you feel whole and complete.

Start by being aware every time that pain arises and ask yourself when you felt the same way – scan your entire life experience and then go back and visit that situation and replay it in your mind, handling it with your wiser, older version of yourself, rather than as the younger unequipped version.

It is not a comfortable exercise, but one that can dissolve past emotional pain, pretty quickly.

Understanding Emotional Pain

No matter what kind of emotional pain you are dealing with right now, you’ve got to know that it’s your mind’s way of motivating you to pursue your emotional needs. If it seems that your mind has found a way to help you satisfy your emotional needs, you have to follow it.

Trust yourself!  Your sub-conscious mind doesn’t lie. It’s not those damn EMOTIONS that are causing the problem right?  they are doing exactly what they’re told to do.  Your emotions are driven by you inner paradigm, which sits in you sub-conscious mind…aka beliefs.  

It is almost as if your emotions reminding you about this emotional pain, that something is off and needs to be addresses.

This is where growth happens, this is where we got to the CAUSE and not just look for superficial answers that will treat the symptoms.

This is just a basic article and emotions and emotional pain are pretty complicated to grasp, but with the help of a coach you be well on your way to clearing old negative emotional patterns.  Remember you can always reach out to me if you’re looking for a one on one coach or online life coach, that can help you be the best version of yourself.


Peace and Love,





, ,


I welcome you to contact me for more information
about any of my products or services.